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A Journey For Life-From Carnivore To Vegetarian

By
Kanan AgnihotriGautam
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0

A Journey For Life-From Carnivore To Vegetarian

Vegetarian is the kind diet
The kind diet

Each life is a sequence of moments. These moments affect us in various ways but some of them overpower in a way that leads us to rediscover ourselves. This discovery itself is no less than a miracle. I experienced one such miracle which proved to be a journey for life to me from being a carnivore to a strict vegetarian.

I remember during my childhood non vegetarian food meant ‘mutton’ and my father loved to cook it for my mother and me.  Ironically, despite being great cooks, he and my sister were vegetarians. During mid seventies, we became aware of the harmful effects of red meat, thus shifted to white meat. Eggs for breakfast was a staple for everyone. It was in 1976, my mother suddenly decided to go vegetarian, which meant no meat and eggs at home. Initially, I accepted unquestionably but not able to carry on any longer, I revolted. After all I was a non vegetarian addict in my own right.

Weight Loss on a non vegetarian diet…

I owe my 30 kg weight loss story to chicken, fish and eggs. I followed a low carb meat based (Keto) diet from 2011 to 2014. I left Keto diet but non vegetarian food never left me. They say, meat is addictive; sure it is and no one knows it better than me.

September 2017….

A new moment….

Morning unfolded with a violent nightmare in which I saw our pet baby Cherub without his posterior. Observing certain issues with his urine flow, we decided to visit Govt. Veterinary College and Hospital RAJUVAS. They confirmed ‘Urinary Tract Stones’, requiring emergency surgery.

The same morning another moment…

One of my former students posted a video on Facebook, exposing animal (dog) abuse. Early in the morning, that graphic video disgusted and shocked me. I cussed and hated those abusive people.

The soul saving moment…

After surgery, while tending my helpless dog, I was reminded of the video. I was agonized seeing my little baby in pain. Then it hit me hard, “why didn’t I ever think of the pain of all those animals, I had enjoyed as meals? They too must be in pain the same way like my own pet!”

That was the end to it all…

All my life, I had been making my whole family understand benefits of non vegetarian food. I had never ever felt any kind of guilt. Here was this, ‘one moment, one visual and one pet’s suffering’ that made me feel like a loser.

Will I ever preach vegetarianism?

No, I don’t intend to force or convince anyone to be a vegetarian. I believe in freedom of making a personal choice. It is every one’s personal call. For the uninitiated here are a few facts….

  • A report says that the green house gases  generated by the livestock are way more than all the cars and trucks in the world combined.
  • Every 3.6 seconds a person, mostly children under 5, die from starvation. Reason being that almost 40-70{ded759bd01f8bbd6e80ef72a3f712ac3f66882318c37a869eaabdd16d0df1e38} of global grain production is consumed by the livestock. If all food crops grown globally were fed directly to humans, especially those kids, around 70{ded759bd01f8bbd6e80ef72a3f712ac3f66882318c37a869eaabdd16d0df1e38} more food would be added to the world’s food supply. That would surely be enough to feed 4 billion additional people.

It took one month for my Cherub to recover from his surgery but it took me just one day to recover my soul. Today after nine months, I feel like a new born. I took a baby step towards positivity, reduced carbon footprints. Not to mention the self pride for accomplishing, what I always thought to be impossible. I did it, are you going to do it?

Here is a video for all the chicken lovers…. May be some day after seeing this you too decide to walk the path of humanity and kindness.

The Tilted Axis Of Life

By
Kanan AgnihotriGautam
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0

The Tilted Axis Of Life

A common Indian woman generally has an axis to revolve around. That axis can be anything or anyone under the cover of ‘love’. From love for the family, parents, children, siblings to ” What will people say!”. A few lucky ones get to choose their own axis while some get a ‘hitching post’ in the garb of axis. They stay there forever without any option to break free. All they look for is a chance to wallow in the glory of their little moments of independence which might mean to tilt their axis of life.

Her axis is a hitching post….

Woman and Earth
The tilted axis of life

This is about a woman who works as our house help. A mother of two, in her late twenties. After working in five houses on a regular basis, she works in a few homes temporarily to add a little extra in her kitty. In the evenings she goes back home running to avoid being welcomed by a drunk husband with a stick in hand to beat her up.

Her husband is an alcoholic. He doesn’t work but for the times when he gets short of money to buy his daily quota of alcohol. From household expenses to children’s education, everything is the lady’s responsibility.

“What is the need to educate children….Am I not living happily without any education?” says the wise man.

She never cribs about the kind of life she leads but on some days, she is all smiles and relaxed. That happens only when her husband goes out of station ‘to earn money’. When her husband stays at home, she chews ‘Gutkha’ which according to her ‘helps in doing extra work and forget her pain’.

Her mobile phone is her constant companion but no ‘Sir’ or ‘Bhaiya’ can call her. A male voice would mean a thrashing for her with a stamp of being a woman of ‘loose character’.

She tilted her axis…..

“Is your husband not here these days?” I asked her hearing her sing while cooking.

She smiled with a glint in her eyes, “No, he has gone down south to earn money.”

“Where?”

“How do I know? For the last one month he is off radar.”

“You mean to say, you don’t know his whereabouts?”

“No.”

“And you didn’t even try to find out?”

“Huh! Why should I? He has not given me his contact number. If I ask from his friends, he will beat me up.”

“Still, he is father to your kids!” I was getting rest less at her comfort level now.

“He called me last night from some one’s phone asking for two thousand rupees.”

“Why? Is he not earning there?”

“It is raining there so no work and no money.”

“Oh! He must be hungry…”

“Let him be. You know what! He is in trouble not because of food but liquor. That is why he called me. He is repenting not being with the family. I know that it is just because he doesn’t have anyone to hit and steal away all money from.  You think, I don’t have money? I save it in the bank for children. I have not told him about it.” She almost whispered the last sentence.

“So now what?” I asked.

“Nothing! Let him be there. Why should I get him back. Let him suffer there. At least that much revenge I deserve for all the suffering I have been through.”

“If he is so abusive, why don’t you leave him?” I hesitatingly asked.

“Leave him! Why? I have spent every penny I have earned on this family. The land belongs to his family but I have constructed house for my children. Why should I leave comfort of a house for a loser like him? It is good for us if he stays away longer.”

Woman and Earth…

Woman, you are like earth. The only difference being earth has a naturally tilted axis giving her relief from scorching sun, while women need to create that tilt for their hitching posts. May be because she knows how to create her comforting seasons herself.

Carvaan Radio- A Trip Down The Memory Lane

By
Kanan AgnihotriGautam
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2

Carvaan Radio- A Trip Down The Memory Lane

Some time back, I watched  Amitabh Bachchan and Rishi Kapoor starrer, 102 Not Out. It was a nice happy movie with all male characters for a change. No, I am not reviewing the movie but just talking about the 70s and 80s. It was a trip down memory lane, with old melodies swarming my mind. Thanks to Caravaan Radio which led me on a trip down the memory lane.

Carvaan Radio
Carvaan Radio 102 Not out

The movie introduced ‘Carvaan’ radio as Amitabh Bachchan is shown spending evenings with retro music. All those scenes looked so familiar with the kind of atmosphere created in the film. It made me revisit old memories of those quiet  cold evenings, spent with a glass of steaming hot tea in hand and soft music floating in the air through radio.

Music and radio was so different then. There was a kind of solace in the songs. Singers sang the melodies without any thumping noise in the name of  music. Each and every song catered to the feelings and moods of the listeners.

I grew up listening to the likes of Geeta Dutt, Lata Mangeshkar, Vani Jairam, Asha Bhonsale, Rafi, Kishore Kumar, Mukesh and other such legends.

Who can forget the incomparable Ameen Sayani with his deep voice presenting Binaca Geet Mala. I still remember the disappointed faces of people when Antakshari and Binaca Geet Mala were discontinued on Vividh Bharti. It was like a part of life was getting over, which indeed was.

Music as my career path…

My love for music of that era made me decide my career path in All India Radio. When I joined All India Radio Shimla as a Transmission Executive in 1989, it was considered such a big achievement. The idea of spending the whole day with all kinds of music excited me. There were people sending song requests to radio stations and the announcers announcing their names with pride as if distributing medals to them. Such beautiful were those days.

I still remember, my target was to add a new music cassette every month to my collection, which I proudly displayed in the living room. There were different sets of music for different times of the day and  moods. The evenings were meant exclusively for old movie songs  or gazals by Jagjeet Singh.

The ‘Radio mood’ set in 102 Not Out through Carvaan is heart warming. The idea of listening to something that has the power to transport us back to the softness and beauty of our past is simply amazing.

Carvaan Radio is available on Amazon 

 

My Experience With Keto Diet

By
Kanan AgnihotriGautam
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0
I needed to lose weight and I ate this...

My Experience With Keto Diet

I believe whatever happens in life, happens for a reason. My experience says that today what pains you might be the biggest joy in our lives tomorrow. I say so with experience that began with a depressed fat woman, wanting to lose weight without compromising her messed up lifestyle. I didn’t have any control over my physical as well as emotional self. My life was a non-stop cycle of crying, eating, sleeping, cribbing and eating again. Then I recaptured my life in such a way that today I had a personal success story to narrate. Today I blog positive notes because I have tried to overcome the negatives in my life.

One fine day, I just stumbled upon a new way of eating on internet. It was about cutting grains, dairy, fruits and sugar in all forms.  This was a diet that was very low on carbohydrates and high on fats. I was ready to eat non vegetarian meals without grains but giving up on fruits and sugar was just too much.  I never thought that I could have butter and cheese as snacks. That was for the first time I understood that fats can be healthy too.

Keto diet
I needed to lose weight and I ate this…

My life changing experiment…

I was a sugar addict  and a ban on fruits and dairy was the biggest challenge, I decided to throw myself in. First week was a torture. I craved but didn’t cave in as I decided to exercise along with controlling food. By the end of first week, I had lost seven kilos weight. I gasped with joy and decided to stay on this wonderful way of eating.

By the end of two months of my new way of eating, I was already thirty kilos down. At this point of time I realized that I was following a diet which was known as ‘Keto(genic) diet’.  Happy with the great results, I decided to stay on it forever.

Then everything stopped moving…

Thirty kilos had vanished but after that everything stopped moving. No change in weight affected my motivation levels too. I increased workouts and decreased calories. Nope, nothing seemed to work.

It was time to travel and I was forced to eat carbs in the form of Dosa, Idli, Sambhar, Rice and chapatis. Four days of a back to carbs diet (no sweets) made me depressed again and I started feeling like a failure. After four days when I stepped on the weighing scale, I cried. Yes, I cried with joy because I had lost another four kilos. That was the time I came to know about carb cycling and body getting into fasting mode.

You gain some and lose some….

From 98 kilos, I was down to 67 kilos but in the excitement of losing weight rapidly, I didn’t realize the changes my body was going through internally.

Positive changes were:

  • A wonderful high in my energy level
  • Peaceful sleep without any Apnea and snoring issues
  • Off all hypertension medicines
  • Asthma, Thyroid issues under control
  • Improved dressing sense

Negative changes were:

  • A faded complexion (I didn’t take any multi vitamins and other supplements)
  • A little lose skin with lots of stretch marks (It is natural when you lose excess weight and your skin starts shrinking)
  • Lots and lots of hair loss (No one told me about having biotin supplements)
  • Worst negative of Keto Diet was gaining back more than half of the lost weight once you start getting back to your regular Indian meals.
  • Over-confidence that you can restart anytime. No, once you lose track, it is not that easy to restart and get the same quick results.

Keto is a lifestyle. no magic…

Once I lost my flow and steam, I unknowingly got back to my sugar addiction and grains. That resulted in my weight gain again. Though, I woke up in time and regained my control over myself, yet its a slippery road.

The win-win situation…

My Keto life was a wonderful experience that made me regain my health, heart and most importantly my long lost self confidence. As I mentioned in the beginning, when we go to our lowest, it means that we are going to bounce back with more power and strength.

I left the battle in between because I couldn’t persist and persevere. But isn’t that true about overall life too? We lose our battles due to lack of perseverance and persistent.

Today also I am on my weight loss journey but on a different track. I did not lose my basic track, rather I made a conscious decision to change my track seeing my present physical conditions.

The path might be different, what matters at the end of the road is the sight of your destination point. Yes, I can see it somewhere down the road. Till then I keep walking my path to success because life is all about reaching your destination, safe and healthy.

Our Car Was Mid-Air And Then I Had An Epiphany

By
Kanan AgnihotriGautam
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0
Our Car Was Mid-Air And Then I Had An Epiphany

Our Car Was Mid-Air And Then I Had An Epiphany

All our lives, we keep striving for a detached yet meditative state of mind and yet we fail. But some times, all it takes is being a shot-gun, mid-air  to reach that highest point in life which changes you.

That day, we started for our destination at 3 am with a definite plan to reach home by 12 noon. With the sun, now warm and beaming in all its glory, I started typing into my cellphone. My conscious stream of rumbling thoughts became the following:

“When life throws you in emergencies, stay calm. It surely is going to be an amazing new experience.”

I smiled to myself after reading my musings and looked up to continue watching the early morning view. Suddenly, I noticed our car drifting towards the right and leaving the highway. I asked my husband what was going on and he replied calmly, “Nothing, all is fine”.

Within the next instant our car turned around as in action movies. Outside the window pane, I saw the glaring sun, the gravel on the road and I saw everything happening in slow motion like in movies. The car sprung up from the edge of the road, flew up in in the air then headed for the wall, straight on.

Cut to an inside car scene, I quickly secured my cell phone under my thighs, for we were surely going to need it soon. My eyes opened to the white smoke and burning smell from the gun powder all around and the deflated airbags. This is when I realize we were in the midst of a fatal car accident and I quickly secured my cellphone under my thighs, for we were surely going to need it soon.

After those few seconds of ‘air-time’, the car came down with a thud but I have already had my epiphany!

Too bad for a two months old car
Our Car Was Mid-Air And Then I Had An Epiphany

I turned towards my husband to ask what had happened and if he was okay. He didn’t look towards me, but repeated  “All okay, all is well”, opening his seat belt. I looked back to check my pet baby, Cherub, who looked fine but eager to get out of the car. So all was fine, no injuries, what else could one ask for. I opened my seat belt and exited the car along with Cherub.

The bad and good people…

In no time onlookers had started clicking pictures and making videos of the accident site. That made me lose my patience and I shouted at them for their shameless behavior. With the now searing sun at 39* Celsius and a drunkard commenting, “Was your dog driving the car?”, I couldn’t help my over-reaction. Aargh!

“That madam is hurt”, I heard someone shout after which I looked down to find my foot smeared in blood. I pulled my jeans up to find a deep cut on the lower part of my leg. Okay, fine! The sight was ghastly with tissues visible and all bloody. Treating that cut with 8 stitches later in the hospital, was surely worse. In all gratitude, the people proved to be genuinely helpful. Especially one retired bank employee, who arranged everything from calling the local village doctor for first-aid to the crane which would lift our, now mangled car and eventually made it possible for us to home before twilight.

“Life is the weirdest thing that happens to anyone”

“Life is the weirdest thing that happens to anyone”, and I think that is, by far, the weirdest statement ever made by me. It teaches us new lessons in the most strangest of ways but also gives us an opportunity to test these lessons . Surely, life is a strange teacher.

While we were being towed towards home, I got some time to ponder over the past few hours.  For the last few years, I had been trying really hard to practice detachment but every time I failed miserably. This is when I realized that this whole accident was a re-test. This day made me realize my latent strength and discover a new me.

During my stint at that ‘air time’, I realized that not only was I, not afraid of dying but there was this strange calm inside of me. The calm which is completely opposite to my normal jittery self.

Those decisive moments between life and death taught me some valuable lessons. Those moments was that special re-test which I had now passed with utmost peace and satisfaction. They were an offer to prove myself worthy of every thought that had crossed my mind till now, on how to live a live, unattached from every thing and every being. My bodily reflexes choose to safeguard a phone for future use and my brain chose to NOT think about death or life.

Self discovery from that epiphany

For a very long time now, a thought had been bothering my very sense of being, “In that critical moment of truth, did I fail as a mother and a daughter?” The only reply I could give myself was, “I might have failed in that role but as an individual, I felt uplifted and enlightened, in my relationship with self.” This self discovery, from that epiphany.

As the sun dimmed, making way for the rain to pour its heart out, I had emerged to be stronger than what I thought of myself to be. I had survived that day to now believe that a strong and an enlightened individual surely makes for a better parent. You need to be strong from the inside to take few decisions for the betterment of your children. Children naturally grow up to be independent but a parent needs extra effort to be detached enough to let the kids grow.

I grew up in those moments of epiphany.

She Gives Away Her Best So That They Could Bloom

By
Kanan AgnihotriGautam
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0
She gave her all so that they could bloom...

She Gives Away Her Best So That They Could Bloom

Yesterday was Mothers Day. Social media was abuzz with activity. I too wished my mother in the morning. Frankly speaking,  mother is not a person to be remembered and thanked on one particular day in an year. Each mother is a story of love and a saga of sacrifices.

One thing that breaks a mother’s soul is when her hopes are shattered. Expectation is the reason for all disappointments. All that a mother asks for is emotional support, care and smiles as gift from her children. Is she asking for too much?

The mother tree

Mother Tree
She gave her all so that they could bloom…

Every morning when I go for a walk, I see this tree. It is a weak looking, thin stemmed tree, full of bright yellow blooms. Incidentally there is no other flowering tree in the vicinity. Today morning as I crossed it, weirdly enough my mind equated the tree to mothers. I was reminded of all those mothers who couldn’t afford a lavish lifestyle. The mothers, who worked hard enough to make their children get everything that they could not.

Mother’s world is really strange and weird

There are mothers who give their best to enable the children grow into beautiful human beings, despite all kind of physical and emotional abuse they had to go through themselves. There are mothers who despite their personal emotional insecurities, struggle to provide emotional strength to children. Mothers who are ready to fight for their children and mothers who can kill anyone to keep their children safe.

I am a mother too. There are times when I have been blamed for behaving like, ‘Gandhaari’.

Once I asked my mother, “It seems, you love my younger sister more than me.” She looked at me with blank expressions and said, “A mother has to stand by the child, who is the weaker one. The one who cannot take a stand for herself.”

It was heart breaking then but today I can understand. A mother child relationship is a strange equation. They compliment each other and at moments when the mother as a woman is about to breakdown, it’s her children give her strength. The stronger one pushes her to fight and the weaker one becomes the reason to keep the fight on. A mother gives away her everything so that the  most colorful spring of her life keeps blooming.

Time to let them go…

A mother gives her best to her children and make them ready to take on the world. For that she has to let them go. That is a difficult thing to do. It is one lesson that she has to learn herself first. Before the children learn how to handle their lives, the mother has to learn it for herself.

Mother empowers her children and make them ready to face the world on their own. That is the test of life-skills and values learnt, not only for the children but also for the mother.

A mother can show her kids the right way to go, but can not walk their path. They have to go ahead, crossing all the hurdles themselves, but yes, whenever she sees them giving up in their struggle, she pops up like a cheer leader to give them the required nudge to keep on going.

Keep fighting….

“Life is difficult but giving up is never an option. Keep fighting and give your best shot because you have your dreams, which only you can fulfill. Remember, your failure in achieving your dreams will be your mothers’ failure too because long back I gave up my dreams so that you could fulfill yours.” Those will be my words to my children till I breathe my last.

Kiddos, you have to keep moving ahead, Keep going on for your mothers’  sake because she has given her best to you when you needed her, It’s payback time now.

Know more about me here..

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